Friday, March 15, 2013

Putting Your Man Above THE Man?

By Julie Gernand
“Don’t follow your heart because your heart can be deceived. You have to lead your heart.” [Fireproof, 2008]
“Oh, what am I DOING?”

I asked myself this question one sticky summer night while sitting in my bedroom. I was anxiously waiting for a boy’s Skype name to appear in the little blue box on my screen. Let’s call him Bob.

Bob lived over two hours away, and he was indeed what many would call a “summer fling.” We had met on the internet, and had gone on only a couple of dates. But each night I would wait impatiently for him to call me on my computer, desperate for someone to show me affection. I became upset if I did not hear from him, and I knew from the stirring feeling in my soul that something wasn’t right.

I longed for Bob to tell me things I wanted to hear, to fill me up. I clung to every word he said.

I was making Bob into an idol. The Devil’s lies were deceiving me.

Bob was getting in the way of my First Love.

Dear ladies, do you have a similar story? 

We all have idols in our lives.

And in so many cases, friends, we make idols out of the men we love, or whom we THINK we love.

Sadly, we so often put people in the place of our First Love, Jesus Christ, and neglect the ways in which he wishes us to walk.

Why is this dangerous?

Exodus 20:3 “You shall have no other gods before me.”

When we “worship” things other than Jesus with our thoughts and actions, we neglect our Savior’s love. His love is so much better than anything found on this feeble Earth! It is unceasing and unconditional! When we neglect him, we reject his love, and we sacrifice so many blessings he wants to shower us with. We tell him with our actions that we can do life by ourselves, and that we don’t need his help in figuring out how we should act. And the Devil loves nothing more than a relationship that drives us away from Christ. When we allow ourselves to worship mortal men, dear ones, we truly give the Devil a foothold into directing us into more actions that lead us away from our Lord.

Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

Author Joshua Harris writes the following in his book Boy Meets Girl:

“Another part of guarding our hearts in fellowship involves making sure we’re not trying to take God’s place in each other’s lives. If you’re beginning to look to each other as your main source of comfort, encouragement, and courage, something is wrong. Remind each other to find your soul’s satisfaction in God alone.” [Boy Meets Girl, p.82]

Guarding our hearts. Hmmm, I admit, this one is much more easily said than done. So often we want to give in to what the world says will give us pleasure – lusting, freely sharing your deepest desires, and saying yes to anything that appears desirable that comes our way. Yet, as women walking with Christ, we know that God has given us his word to follow for our own good, just as a loving parent gives guidelines to a child. For we know that God’s promises are true and lasting, and the tempting things of this world are merely temporary. The words of a man may be sweet to your ears, but the love of the Lord will never leave you.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

God never intended for Adam to be the end-all, be-all for Eve. Nor the other way around! Eve was created to be Adam’s help-mate, someone to be a suitable companion for him. They were created to walk through life together, with the Lord guiding their footsteps. It is that world that our souls long for, and so many of us do not realize that our lives have that craving. I believe we see bits of heaven on Earth when couples look to the Lord. It is what was in the beginning, and from which we have been drawn away by our sinful nature.

The cord of three strands - Lord, man, and woman - is strong and lasting.

I am happy to say that soon after meeting Bob, the Lord directed me to my now-husband, and my eyes were opened to a wonderful man who helps remind me that we are to look to the Lord before all else. No person is perfect, and we are all sinful beings, but when we look to the Lord in our relationships – praying together and seeking wisdom – we point ourselves down the right path.

Lord, We think that we can do things apart from you. Forgive us when we worship people instead of you. Help us to live in ways that are pleasing to you, never forgetting that you are the first, lasting lover of our souls. Guide our relationships, Jesus, and help us seek to be more like you.


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